


Palmy don't need more press

by Anonymous



Category: Club Jebs, Palmy's Paradise
Genre: LOL CURRUPTEZ KINDA MEAN IN THIS, M/M, Ninny is ready to KILL, Wow so wholesome :heart_eye_emoji:, anyways im a pro writer what can i say, bunneh go haha WACK, bunneh is a mentor!!, but like a really bad one, bye, dont judge me ihave nothintg to do, ik this is weird pllease, ok ok this is kind of weird, ur a good one i swear its just in this story your a bad one, why
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:14:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27713938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Curruptez wasn't the kind of person to typically just 'fall in love' with anyone. Especially the new guy across the street.Crack curruptez x palmy dont question me :sob:
Relationships: Curruptez/Palmy - Relationship
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i already regret this

* * *

Curruptez wasn't the kind of person to typically just 'fall in love' with _anyone_.

Okay maybe he _was_. But that wasn't quite the point here. The guy across the street from him was just...Different. The Cardi B music played lightly in the background as Curruptez idly thought of all the possible outcomes to going up to the new guy across the street and actually interacting but his thoughts were cut short as the raucous bell echoed throughout the house. _great_ he thought to himself, rolling his eyes in annoyance. 

"What do you want you disgusting piece of tra-"

Curruptez cut himself off at the person who stood in the door in front of him, eyes wide in shock. This was the guy who he saw across the street earlier. The more he looked at him, the more he reminded him of someone else... The huge green palm leaves that hung off his head put him off at first but the more he looked at it, the more fashionable it looked. Curruptez was almost jealous.

"Um what did you just call me?" The boy in front of him replied with a sharp tone to it.

"I didn't say anything."

"Yeah okay whatever you say." 

_Press press press press press, Cardi don't need more press_

The music continued to blast around Curruptez's home, and the mysterious boy at his door seemed to take notice.

"You listen to Cardi B?"

"... Yeah. I do. You have a problem with that?"

"No. I like Cardi-"

"What's your name." Curruptez didn't mean to cut the other guy off, he merely spoke out loud without realizing .He seemed to do be doing that a lot recently.

"First of all; don't cut me off or I'll slit your throat open in 270 different ways.Don't test me. Secondly, it's Palmy." Okay. Maybe he was a little crazy, but Curruptez could work with that.

"Oh.. Okay. How about we listen to Cardi B together later?" Was all Curruptez could say.

"Okay. Bye then..." Palmy shrugged awkwardly and backed away before fully Naturo running down the road. Weird.

* * *

"AND THATS WHY I HAVE TO MEET WITH HIM AN HOUR." Practically screaming at this point, and obviously in a panic, Bunneh did the only rational thing someone can do when trying to convince Curruptez to calm down.

"SHUT UP YOU UGLY STUPID IDIOT AND SIT DOWN YOUR GOING TO GET YOURSELF DROP KICKED OUT OF MY HOUSE IF YOU DONT BE QUIET."

"OKAY SORRY SORRY." Curruptez backed down, thinking of his next words.

"So what exactly are you asking me here... You do realize this guy literally threatened to murder you." Bunneh flatly said.

"When did I ask your opinion on him?"

"Oh okay. Get out of my house."

"WHAT THE HELL BUNNEH YOUR SUPPOSED TO HELP ME." At this point, Curruptez was shouting again. He was confused as to why Bunneh hadn't had anything yet until he realized he was outside. On the floor. with shattered glass all around. him with Bunneh screaming back at him from the second floor window of her house.

"YOU'VE COME TO ME ONLY TALK TO ME IF YOU ACTUALLY NEED SOMETHING YOU LMAO"

"Ugh. It's not like I wanted your help anyways." Curruptez picked himself up and walked away. 

* * *

" AND THAT'S WHY I HAVE TO MEET HIM IN 30 MINUTES." Once again, practically screaming, Curruptez continued his rant as to why Bunneh had been no help at all.

"Maybe you could-"

"I DONT WANT TO HEAR IT MATTHEW. WHY DID I EVEN ASK YOU ANYWAYS. I'M LEAVING." And just like that, Curruptez stormed out, not hearing what advice Matthew had to say.

* * *

"PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS"

"CARDI DON'T NEED MORE PRESS"

"Wow. That was actually really fun karaoke." Palmy said with a smile on his face. Curruptez thought it was pog.

"Yeah.. I got a gift for you Palmy." He handed over the new Trisha Paytas Album for 'I Love You Jesus'.

Maybe they would be okay after all.


	2. The Bloodbath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yeah uh its in the chapter name. bunneh is also there too kinda

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Curruptez and Palmy? I don't know. I don't think it's going to last long. Maybe Curruptez did time travel, maybe he didn't. But I think its funny."
> 
> "True. I'd like to see how it plays out. It'll be like a movie."
> 
> "I'll grab the popcorn." Bunneh replied. 

> Bunneh say the bunneh line curruptez say curruptez line and ninny say ninny line idc who is narrator :smiley face:

* * *

  
  
Bunneh stared at the screen not blinking at all as the clips of Princess Bubblegum and Marceline slid across the screen at the different beats. It was a cute edit after all. Who wouldn't watch it on loop? They remembered vaguely as to why they were at Ninny's house. Curruptez had asked them all to meet there for a 'Top secret meeting.' But knowing him, it probably wasn't as important as he was making it sound. But of course, they had followed along just in case it was important.

* * *

"Hey guys..." Curruptez stepped into the living room awkwardly smiling. He was suspiciously happy today, despite a hint of nervousness could be seen in his eyes. Someone followed behind him. Hand in hand.

" I LOVE YOU JESUSSS.. I LOVE YOU JEEESUSS.." The figure behind him sung with horrible tune in his voice.

"Who is that." Bunneh finally turned away from their screen, mildly annoyed at the fact a stranger had walked into the room.

"Where's Ninny?" Curruptez questioned.

"Who is that. And WHY is he in my house?." Ninny walked into the room, almost at comedic timing, holding a knife in suspicion. Bunneh began to laugh.

"This is my new boyfriend..?" Curruptez said like it was some type of obvious fact that everyone was supposed to know.

"I NEED A BAD BLEEP. ADDISON RAE. LIL SHAWTY THE BADDEST AND SHE GOT HER WAYS." Palmy sung, obviously not caring at all that a knife was being threatened at him.

"He literally looks like a **clone** of you Curruptez." Ninny said ,confused and probably ready to murder.

"WHO ASKED??" Palmy cut her off. Ninny was normally always calm and would hardly ever scream at people unless it was really necessary, after all she didn't want to have to waste her energy on people who didn't matter. Today would mark the day she broke that.

"DID YOU JUST CUT ME OFF?? IN MY HOUSE?? LOOKING LIKE A CLONE OF CURRUPTEZ?? GET OUT OF HERE." Ninny finally broke.

"I BET HE PROBABLY WENT BACK IN TIME AND GOT HIM TO DATE HIMSELF BECAUSE HE WAS SO DESPERATE" Bunneh was almost in tears of laughter at this point. Curruptez looked offended and Palmy walked up to Ninny, ready to start a fight.

Argument filled the room and Ninny and Palmy were attacking each other with knives, Bunneh still laughing as Curruptez was cussing them out in anger and in defense that he indeed, did not travel back in time to date himself out of desperation. 

"I MET HIM BECAUSE HE WAS ME NEIGHBOR !!11!!!!" Curruptez screamed 

"HAHA YEAH SURE WHATEVER YOU SAY" Bunneh was crying now. This was hilarious.

"AT LEAST IM DATING SOMEONE WHO LOOKS PRETTY"

Bunneh wasn't laughing anymore. Bunneh was ready to kill.

* * *

"Think you could beat me in a fight?" Ninny's hair emitted a shadow over her face. She looked like a true murderer.

"Easily." Palmy laughed, swinging the knife in circles.

"Pog .You're going to die now and I guess Curruptez will be single again. As always." Ninny replied, laughing like Palmy was a walking joke.

Palmy ran at ninny and the stab fight began. Who won!?! we will never know.

* * *

> 2 hours later because ok

Curruptez walked home angrily with Palmy at his side. How could Bunneh and Ninny betray him like this??They were supposed to be friends.

"Well that went badly." Curruptez laughed to himself.

"They were just pressed." Palmy scowled, an evil grin washed over his face.

"PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS"

"CARDI DONT NEED NO PRESS" They laughed together. Even if they didn't have Bunneh and Ninny right now, they had each have each other. And that's all that mattered. Palmy took out his phone and sent some messages making fun of whoever he was texting. Thinking over what Bunneh said earlier, Curruptez couldn't help but think that him and his boyfriend looked nothing alike.

* * *

"I'd say we won that one." Ninny smiled to herself as she picked up her teacup and sipped on it.

"Yeah. Ok." Bunneh continued staring at her laptop screen as the edit played for the 50,000th time that day.

"Do you think that they are good together?" Ninny turned her head to face Bunneh.

"Curruptez and Palmy? I don't know. I don't think it's going to last long. Maybe Curruptez did time travel, maybe he didn't. But I think its funny."

"True. I'd like to see how it plays out. It'll be like a movie."

Bunneh stared around at the blood splattered walls around them from the previous fight . "I'll grab the popcorn." They replied. 

NOTE: CAN CURRUPTEZ STOP SAYING GG IM GOING INSANE THIS IS KILLING ME WHEN IM TRYING TO WRITE :sob:

**Author's Note:**

> yeah um


End file.
